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Breaking Open

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 There we are again. Another little story that ended as fast as it had begun. It was quick and in its whole a total misunderstanding on all levels or... Something that I may have looked through entirely, rising from my experiences and finally hitting the nail on the head just in time, just in the right moment, exposing what was masked behind intelligence, intellect, good manners and smooth talk. Something that was meant to stay hidden not to ruin the chance of being truly seen, uncovering the darkness, the blindness, the things we deny so we cannot be truly seen, to keep this image of ourselves that we've build up so carefully to impress, to be loved, to be admired, to be accepted and wanted. To matter. https://www.instagram.com/reel/DL8fISaPCqu/?igsh=YTB3aGhpa2VrZG9x https://www.instagram.com/p/DLuU1SZMr43/?img_index=6&igsh=eXgyd2RheGllYjZs Starting as an average quick pick up in the bar nights of Berlin I did not expect any further contact, let alone another meeting to get to...
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Don’t Hate - Integrate

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https://www.instagram.com/p/DJ9czgcoxFq/?img_index=6&igsh=OTQ3bXUzOHgzendh  ... Sometimes these wisdoms just come randomly sparkling out of me. The other Day. I didn't even notice before she repeats my phrase. So true. We have all these little things, patterns, behaviors, habits, shadows, sides of us we wish we didn't have or that we could change or transform. But instead of understanding that each and every feature also has a super power, some magic behind it we tend to condemn it, want to get rid of it or hide it. We're sitting in his room like so many times before. He says he hates it. He is talking about how his mind works. My spontaneous answer don't hate it, integrate it. Without even noticing how much truth it holds. A mirror of how deeply I have  already   integrated my own 'flaws', 'inadequacies', parts I didn't want to acknowledge, whatever we wish to name them. The little things in us we would not like to see or have as part of our pe...
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In My Entitled Opinion

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Control and My Entitled Opinion - How to ruin our connections effectively .   Control our friend and helper that keeps us 'safe' in a world that seems so unpredictable. In a world that is so chaotic and dangerous, making it a little more predictable, a bit more safe. C0ntrol selling us power, strength, confidence. Making us feel indestructible, untouchable. Untouchable. Untouchable surely we become, not only for all that we are trying to fight off, that we are trying to keep away from us to protect ourselves but also for everything we're actually craving so much. Love, connection, belonging. There is never only one side, one effect to our mechanisms. There is always the other side we like to overlook. The side of what our protection mechanism is also keeping from us besides the unwanted pain and shame and guilt. And not only that but what effect it has on the other part involved which  is  mostly  causing the exact pain we're trying to keep out the gates for ourselve...
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The Complexity of Simplicity

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Tulsi. Circles. Yoga. Rishikesh. The little things. Sunkiss. Unkiss . Transition. Between my two favorite places in the Himalayas. It's time. I'm becoming sentimental. Firstly when I receive a message from my old and new neighbor looking forward to seeing me to have quality conversations. All on a sudden I remember the little things. What a great connection we had, our conversations, how he went berserk over my eyes the day before I left. How I chilled in his room when I felt sick. How I felt a little sad not having more time together and yet I knew I would come back, leaving some things with him. Sunkiss . As he refers to himself in the message, it makes me smile, bringing back more detailed memories. Of course he’ll be happy to have me back, being curious to know about my experiences away in the mountains and  eager to practice some yoga with me. It makes me smile.  Going to my beloved Oh so beloved Torture Master to open my body, practice the balance, I become similarly emo...
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