My Colleague Neighbour Friend

 As I sat on my floor last night trying to figure out what fits into my backpack that I could possibly take and what I have to leave behind, drinking a glass of wine because my emotions were going in all kinds of directions, feeling a bit out of place - my colleague and neighbour friend calls me asking me out for a short walk to say good bye. Excellent timing as it hadn't been for the first time since we got to know each other. I just thought about him the minute before and had been eager to call him out if he hadn't done it himself.

I like this person so much. I realized I was not even really aware of it until this exact moment writing this right now. And I also have no idea where it is coming from only I know it is coming from a deep place inside my heart. I never thought of him in that way that I connect to him but I see now that I did and I am more than grateful for that. As Corona brought out a lot of different situations for people lucky for me it brought many funny, wonderful moments for me connecting with my neighbour colleague. 

No matter if it was me looking like Quasimodo after having a horrible accident, having a good laugh about it on the streets with him when at the same time he so kindly offered me his help for whatever I may be in need of. Or if it was us doing our now and so often grocery chocolate toilet paper stash exchange deals on open street or in front of the door with masks on when he was too lazy to go twice a day to check for toilet paper at the Aldi or I was in Quarantine. He would be the first one to call asking me what he could do for me offering to go to shop for whatever I may need, even if it was just a carton of milk. His care and kindness has touched my heart, it still does. 

These smoothly planted statements that would make my heart smile when he passed in Mauerpark telling me that he was just on his way home with his dog but then saw me laying there in the sun like a mermaid or something equally nice in such an honest and at the same time fun way. Or when I was sitting at the balcony one night smoking a cigarette and he was passing by walking his dog, yelling up to me updating me about the latest state visit when I mentioned our new colleague that I found very attractive he would just reply that he found me much more beautiful. I'm not sure he was ever aware of these moments because neither was I really present. That I felt like the most worthy person on earth, like a little princess being taken care of. 

I will never forget the week I had to stay home for Quarantine and he showed up at my door steps with bags and bags filled with chocolates, cookies, candy, cake and XXL-boxes of ice cream. I felt like a child on her birthday. It's these small moments that fulfill my heart which makes them the greatest moments after all.

All this neighbour-colleague-friendship has started two and a half years ago when in my first week of work I ran into him in the supermarket at night. Or rather to say he ran into me because I would in no way recognize who that guy dressed all in sweat pants and hoody was talking to me. Until he uncovered his incognito identity to me that surely differed from the one in suite in the office. And so I started to see many other sides of this person other than his hilariously funny humorous sarcastic way of pointing out wrongdoings of people or telling stories of whatever nature. 

 As a goodbye gift he would tell me in the same manner of high quality sarcams combined with his caring heart that I will end up as a curry cut filet in the back of some guru's house when I told him that I might wanna go have my basecamp somewhere in the Mountains in Southern Germany at a guy's place that I got to know on the internet who kindly offered me to clear his room for me to stay at his place.

What I got to see the most was his never ending heart. His kindness and his incredible gift of naturally making me feel very comfortable in any situation around him. Opening my heart to you it went from one smile to the next and for that I will forever be grateful to you - especially in these times. 

Thank you so much for sharing your love with me. I will not forget.

LINA