There we are again. Another little story that ended as fast as it had begun. It was quick and in its whole a total misunderstanding on all levels or... Something that I may have looked through entirely, rising from my experiences and finally hitting the nail on the head just in time, just in the right moment, exposing what was masked behind intelligence, intellect, good manners and smooth talk. Something that was meant to stay hidden not to ruin the chance of being truly seen, uncovering the darkness, the blindness, the things we deny so we cannot be truly seen, to keep this image of ourselves that we've build up so carefully to impress, to be loved, to be admired, to be accepted and wanted. To matter. https://www.instagram.com/reel/DL8fISaPCqu/?igsh=YTB3aGhpa2VrZG9x https://www.instagram.com/p/DLuU1SZMr43/?img_index=6&igsh=eXgyd2RheGllYjZs Starting as an average quick pick up in the bar nights of Berlin I did not expect any further contact, let alone another meeting to get to...
Seems we're always meeting in the snow ... I'm thinking while looking at the picture from almost four years ago. How did that even happen? How does any of this really happen? Just when I take a screenshot of the old me in the snow storm, my mind is trying to remember details. He's a traveler, photographer - a good one. I love the pictures. Now he's in Berlin. I'm having a photo shooting she will say a few minutes later as if my own thoughts have again been manifesting outside of me. Like my thoughts have been wandering in strange directions. A yoga clothing brands. A universal one. Produced in Rajasthan. I see who is making them. It needs branding with the zodiacs. Pictures. A few days back I see his story. He moved to Berlin. Random. We text. I have the feeling he must be near. Somehow. I don't even know him. I hardly remember at all. It's Friday. It surely has been another week of random manifestations. I feel like things are just happening for me. Inv...
Control and My Entitled Opinion - How to ruin our connections effectively . Control our friend and helper that keeps us 'safe' in a world that seems so unpredictable. In a world that is so chaotic and dangerous, making it a little more predictable, a bit more safe. C0ntrol selling us power, strength, confidence. Making us feel indestructible, untouchable. Untouchable. Untouchable surely we become, not only for all that we are trying to fight off, that we are trying to keep away from us to protect ourselves but also for everything we're actually craving so much. Love, connection, belonging. There is never only one side, one effect to our mechanisms. There is always the other side we like to overlook. The side of what our protection mechanism is also keeping from us besides the unwanted pain and shame and guilt. And not only that but what effect it has on the other part involved which is mostly causing the exact pain we're trying to keep out the gates for ourselve...
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