More than a Home

Returning from the rescue, days to process. Weeks to process, back in civilization I enter your house. You're smiling openly at my, start talking as if we've always been friends. "Wow this is like a home" I say. "This is Home" You say. And it is nothing less. It is the safest place I've entered since I left my home, my love, my angel, that I've loved so much in another country. I can see the same in your eyes, the same sparkle, the same kindness, the same care, that I know so well. Your positivity radiating so far out while you're cleaning the bath tub, prepare my bed and try to calm down your daughter, having the food on the stove. "Are you hungry?" You ask me. As if you don't already have enough on your plate. "Anything you want to eat, you can". It's the place I needed. I still so. I wish I could stay. I'm washing the dishes. " Stop. I'm getting angry at you." I know this so well. "I will find you help" I say. If I didn't have to go, I would be yours. 

Getting on the mat, the kids playing, you stop vacuuming, your child and the neighbor's come running, giggling, building a circle around me, imitating, doing yoga with me. I feel happiness inside and out, my family, my home. Lying on the couch tired, writing these lines your husband comes running to me in excitement for a stop of the vaccination. Your friend wants to help me, your loud, kind family is a blessing. "I love you" You say. And leave. "I will be back later." You laugh, send me a kiss, put your number in my phone. Did I again find another mom? A new home in one of the big three? I feel like I've always lived with you, when I only arrived two days ago. It reminds me of the same story in another place that lead to big transformation and even more love in my heart. Synchronicity. Going in the same loops. 

I grab my things. You look at me: "oh my sweetheart, are you going? I will miss you so much. You can come back any time. I wish you good luck everywhere you go. If anything happens, if you don't like how people treat you, you call us. We come save you. We can fight back. Maybe you come to our home in Gordi at the sea side in the forest. It's so beautiful. Wherever you're always welcome." I love her, her husband, the children. 

And just when I was writing yet another of what feels like the millions text that you will never read, she looks into my eyes and says: "You are such an amazing soul, you need a good man. Someone who has a soul like you. Someone who understands you. Meet you at the same level." Yes. If it wasn't the hardest thing to find that one when I'm still busy releasing my heart from someone.

Finding home like your place in my journey, save space that I can always come back to is the most precious gift I can ask for. Thank you. Didi Madloba. 💜

My new sister and her friends joining my session 💖




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