Rebirth

Lina‘s Magic Moments

Fabuloussssss. Looking forward to some Lina time. Still good for 4pm? he’s asking. I’m already on the go. Totally excited on this first spring day of the year that’s bringing a heat appropriate for summer time. I put the key into the keyhole and turn it twice. I take a breath in and energetically walk out the door. 

After just a little pit stop in the apartment to send out the contacts and groups, spreading the connections around, I have built over the last weeks to curious souls approaching me for advice.

Only the day before I noticed that I feel I should get more involved into our community events and support all that’s been established more actively. Buying two flower stamps, my next mission is to find an ink pad to be able to use them for our women‘s ecstatic dance. Twirling around in the city with the girls, checking out every shop, I get the final hint in the last one. Could have crossed my mind before. The shop where I see M once in a while.

Heading back for my final mission the ceremonial cacao I just saw at the shop in my mind, I reach the entrance of the shop and… as if I’d called it once again or better as if they’d called me, I look into the smily faces of my teacher and the head of the women’s ceremony. 

Sunshine all around they open their arms wide to pull me in for a big hug. We were just talking about you they both brightly smilingly spit out. There she is. He’s smiling. Secret ceremonial meeting. Like little men in a chessboard the Universe has once more placed all the players concerned in the same spot for the same intend. She is looking at me with her cute poppy eyes if I could support her the next day, arranging all the things necessary around the ceremony, showing up a bit earlier she’s wondering. I happily agree as I came for this exact reason to the shop in the first place. To contribute to the event. Like I’ve felt the day before.

M is gesturing the seller to give me ink as well noting that the pad will be dry as he also bought his for the ceremony in the same place. While we are discussing some details concerning the meeting time for the next day, they start debating about how to get more ceremonial cacao. I knew. I knew. I knew. I knew the minute I left the organic store and the packages of the cacao caught my intention that it must be because they were meant for our ceremony. Without further attention I share my discovery from before with them.

M instantly pulls out his phone. Where did you see it? I'm laughing. The dots connected. He's calling the owner of the shop and takes off only few minutes later to get his goods. The two of us looking at each other shrugging our shoulders making our way out and up. She hands me a bunch of flyers and kindly asks me to hand them to interested women which I am already happily distributing while she’s walking next to me. She asks me for where she could stay and I share the info of my owner with her. She's evidently grateful and we smilingly wave goodbye until the next day. The rising women. 

Only few meters ahead a girls stops, looking at me in a bit of distress, asking me the phone in her hand the same question. Where to go. Where to stay. Where to be. I share all that I know to share about the places, our community, our events, the women’s circle with her. She is giving me her number so I could invite her to our groups as I do once I enter my apartment. She is greatly appreciative and grateful. I receive a message from her expression her appreciation and gratitude. Lina! Thank you so much.. actually this is the first day since I got here that I didn't cry. :( Thank you for your kindness <3 So I wanted to share it with you so you know. Love. I'm touched. I feel her so much. This feeling I know so well feeling lost in this place where everything just seems so foreign, so alien. I can empathize with her from the bottom of my heart and feel more than happy having been able to take part of her insecurities, a part of her lonely feeling, this feeling of being lost and out of place. Our feeling. In hope to have given her a little straw she can cling to and maybe become part of our beautiful family. We’re not gonna make it alone.

Sharing my encounter no one is surprised. Ah nice. This is beautiful. So once more you've picked someone lost from the streets and helped them integrate. The feedback from my surrounding strong these days again. The reflections of the journey of my becoming of who I am today. And so does my M number 2 from two years ago when we finally meet in our favorite cafe, after bumping into each other multiple times these past weeks. He reflects to me with his teary eyes how much I've changed. How happy, how peaceful I appear to be. How different. In all colors, from all sides. Sparkling like a beautiful rainbow in a summer thunderstorm. A thunderstorm of transformation and... Rebirth. Is what he says. The Master. It's starting. Now. I don’t wanna say but… The Magic is back again.

I look at the chat. I don’t get it I’m confused. Rebirth. But when? Did I miss the info for the rebirthing starting the next day? I send him a message, laughing asking what I’ve missed. His answer Indian style not concerning my matter. Indian style. Even Master M. You’re working with the team women tomorrow to set up the ecstatic dance and cacao. Shhhh… This info I had before as sure enough I was in the same place like him earlier this day. I’m still confused about the details and laughing about the absurdity. I send him a voice, he calls. We start chatting he’s telling me that he’ll be in the drama of dealing with the arriving people asking me if I’ll join him for the Kirtan to dance before going to sleep. My eyes are heavy I tell him I’m in bed and in no condition to dance. The argument starts here and there. Master M style. You always say you go to sleep early but then you’re online at 11. You’re an old person. He’s teasing. It doesn’t move me a bit as it’s not true and I am in my bliss and peaceful at heart. I’m too tired and too comfortable in my routine. 

Best when your teacher calls you after 8pm to tell you that you’re an old person. What an amusing exchange before going into my well deserved night rest.

Waking up slowly I feel more than cozy. Somehow the light is not coming through today. It's cloudy, yet my mood bright. This is my time to myself I start typing. Good morning Lina :) Fancy meeting at the cafe this morning? 9am? I do fancy that. Did I only minutes before think about messaging him how much I appreciated our meeting the evening before. All his interested questions about the last two years that we've missed of each others lives. Diving deeply into our processes, the mind, our stories, what has happened to us. Love and broken hearts. I'd forgotten how authentically empathetic he is every time his tears are rising up his eyes when I tell him about a rough patch on my path. Unity. Closing the circle between our dinner and breakfast. It’s a new day to rise and shine in the magical reals of Rishikesh.